Sunday, January 22, 2006

new life

i'm a sinner. i know that. i've sinned. i've not been a man of God to the ppl that matter in my life. i know that. i've not been a good Christian to my unsaved friends. i know that.
but i also know that the sinful nature is dead. sin has no power over me. i have nothing to fear, but fear itself. i know that my life story, will be a part of the universal story, written in revelations... that GOD wins. and i know that with my best friend, God, father, provider, security all in one... i can do all things, through Him who strengthens me.
it's amazing. i spent most of last yr in a depressive funk. why did there not seem to be purpose in my life? why did i stumble again and again? i was not a man of God last yr. i can say that with honesty. but i can also say that... i've learnt things. i can also say that i've recently broken some barriers in my personal life. i can say that i know the victory is won. i've realised that, as Paul writes in Romans... as he talks abt how he sins even though he doesnt want to, he realises that that sin is not a part of him. yes. i get tempted often. but the sinful nature is not a part of me. God has sanctified me. now i just have to rmb that when i get tempted to sin... when i get angry... when i get frustrated.
i've lived in guilt when i should live in freedom in Christ. i've let the Devil lie to me. lie to me that i'm worthless... that i'm weak... that i will always stumble. lies... that i listened to
No more. it's not abt me. it's abt God and what he's doin in me. i can resist temptation. its just sometimes i choose wrong. im not perfect. but i know i can resist it. temptation is no longer such an overbearing presence in my life... that previously i just sinned, because i saw no way out. but God provides a way out of temptation. i have the choice. he has sanctified me. he has made me new. its whether i choose to live in that new nature or the old. and i want to do the right thing for the God who made me who i am... his child... Nickolas Sin. theres none like him. i love Him. and he's teaching me to love myself. i've done things i never would have done in the past for fear of revealing to everyone my weaknesses. but it is in my weaknesses that His glory is revealed. it is in my humanity that His love and power shines through. and it is in submitting to him, no matter the sacrifice that entails... that He works in me... that breakthrough has happened. and im grateful. i've never cried so much. i love him.
God bless