more than life?

what does it mean to sing that 'i love God more than life'?
i guess it has struck me lately that we sing many songs in church, where in some we profess to be able to 'go to the ends of the earth'... and so forth. do we really mean them?
growing up in a family where i have in a sense been taught that 'your word is your bond'... it can be hard to say these words at times without questioning whether i am lying or not. am i?
i dont doubt that God exists, nor that he gave the ultimate price for me, nor that he loves me. i know i love Him. at the very end, when it comes down to the very core of who i am... it is that i want to seek His face... wherever i'm at
sometimes, however i do wonder whether i love him more than life. daily i'm tempted, troubled, assailed, confused, pleased, praised, criticised... how does one keep track? how do u keep track of His face. at times i've felt like my faith is at an all time low... yet i keep singing.
i dont know why. sometimes, i've felt like crawling down into some hole, and just giving up. yet something keeps me going, into this maze that is life... where often i dont know where im heading... or where i'm at, even... it's ironic, on so many different levels.
sometimes i feel i'm heading in circles, 'eternal graceless ones', as put by F. Scott. Fitzgerald in The Great Gatsby... but am i?
i know life has an eternal aspect. what one does now resounds in eternity. that i know. the moment when i face my Saviour ... that's when all this, all this life (troubles, trials, temptations) comes to. makes u wonder whether you're living for the future or now (almost seems like insurance)... but then i've also realised that yes, eternity beckons, but for now, i'm still living on this earth, with 6.5 billion souls (for a few more years, i hope), that I, as a Jesus freak am called to love. its interesting that there is nothing in that calling regarding how ppl react to my love, or how those ppl treat me. but we're called to love. thats that. that keeps life's maze clear for me, for as i seek God's face amidst the tumult of life, thats where He keeps my paths straight. my one refuge, my strong tower. i dont know where i'm heading, but i know He's with me, and i'm happy for that. the writer of Ecclesiastes, after exploring the multitude of contradictions, of troubles in life, concludes:
fear God, and keep his commandments,
for this is the whole duty of man.
so i guess, being a Jesus freak goes beyond singing songs on sunday... it's a lifestyle. can we match up with the words we speak/sing/try to sing? can we live up to our calling as Christians? our name suggests that we are ... ppl of Christ, who was God incarnated on earth. can we live up to it? by God's grace, and our faith that He'll make sense of an otherwise senseless life.
i know i'm not perfect, far from it. but 'there is no condemnation for those in Christ Jesus' (Romans 8:1). i've been set free... from the law of sin and death (Romans 8:2). what does that freedom give? for me, a chance to go along that well-worn path through the maze, that narrow path, paved with the blood of those who went before me, who counted the cost and knew what was worth more than life: following their Saviour, who gave His life so they could gain theirs.
God bless... (in all senses of the word)