Ma Ma

i've been on holiday in Malaysia for the last 2 weeks, attending 3 wedding dinners/lunches and one wedding ceremony. more on that in future posts...

today, i'd like to share one of the true highlights of my trip thus far (LONG, UNEDITED POST AHEAD) - catching up with my grandmother (Mrs Lam Ah Hong/ Ah Hong / Ma Ma). A bit of background. When I was young (in the last few years of my primary school), my family lived in an apartment in Section 17, while my grandma lived in the "family house" in SS2 with some uncles and aunts. As both my parents worked full time, my grandmother was the one who would look after me during the day. At nights, my parents would have dinner in SS2, and we'd return to the apartment, where i'd do my homework, play abit and then sleep. In effect, my grandma's place was where I lived.

In writing this post, I'd first like to say that this is not in any way meant to be a criticism of my parents who have unfailingly supported me all these years. However, this is why i'm especially close to my grandma. She would pick me from school in a Kancil (she'd "gotten" a driving licence in her 60s for that purpose), cook me lunch (and she's an awesome cook - used to do wedding dinners), talk with me, and we'd hang out during the day (I also used to play football daily with some neighbourhood friends). I know it may sound completely uncool to some people (hanging out with your grandma), but now as a 20 year uni student living in Perth, I miss her.

I used to teach her English (and in the process learn cantonese), and we'd talk about how she should give up smoking (she did), her childhood, my day at school, and other things. We'd even garden together. I remember growing long beans, bean sprouts, and on one occasion corn (which didn't work out too well) with her in the garden at the SS2 terrace house. And of course there were the many occasions when I had to help her thread a needle into the sewing machine she kept (younger eyes are sharper). There was even a day when my regular football friends couldnt play and thus she kicked a ball around with me, well until she fell on her back. She still remembers that to this day.

I remember a day at school (when I was in Standard 5) and I had been picked on by my friends all day... to the point where I was about to burst into tears. And I did as I walked out of school towards her. And I will never forget the hug she gave me.

There was also the day when I decided (with one of my "bright ideas") to walk home from school, and I gave her a fright. After searching the school, she eventually drove back and picked me up on the route back. She told me of how scared she was for me. The funny thing is that I can never remember her scolding me to the point where I was afraid, and yet, the lesson would be learnt. She had that knack of making every grandchild feel like the favourite one.

Ma Ma is very dear to me. She has spent all her life serving her family, and I have really been blessed in having her look after me. Today, we went for a walk around the field next door to the SS2 house (my football field many years ago). The years have gone by, and yet SS2 remains almost the same. And later we sat at the swing in the garden, and talked. She misses the days before my family left to Perth, when we all used to hang out together. In a sense the house became quiet after we left, and she felt that keenly (given her family was her life). In her words "ngor um guan jor la. mou lei dei seng yat hai li dou" (I'm not used to it, not having you guys always around). We talked about the times we spent, of how i refused to sleep as a baby, and she would have to get me to sleep - "ngor fan giok chor, but gor lei ger ngan jung hoi tai" (i was asleep already, and yet your eyes were still wide open). We caught up, and she started telling me about her childhood. In a sense, we rolled the years back.

My grandma recently celebrated her 75th birthday (chinese years). And having grown up under her eye, I can see that she's aged visibly. She's not as quick as before in thought and action. She's now on medication for diabetes and high blood pressure. And yet beneath the weight of the years on her features, i can see the heart of a lady who loves her family very much -

an aged rose remains a rose
even after a life flowers
its shed petals grace those nearby
beauty remains in frailty

She's not a Nobel prize winner, or a barrister, or a doctor, or a successful business tycoon, but she's given me so much, and I love her a lot. I cherish everytime we meet, because everytime i say goodbye, i really don't know whether I'll see her again.

God bless you, Grandma

Updates

In the last few weeks (since i've blogged), I've:

• Received a rejection letter from Treasury (for vacation work) - looks like stacking shelves for me this summer.
  
• Gone to Albany and back (cell retreat) - driving, crying inside every time we pumped petrol into the 4WD, more driving, some sights, some rain, some tennis, some sport... It was all good fun (except for the petrol pumping part).
  
• Fallen sick - upon returning from Albany, what started off as a tightness in my throat went on to become a sore throat on Thursday, a fever that night, and a nice hacking cough on Friday... I probably deserved it though. The only green thing I ate while at Albany was possibly a Natural Confectionery Company Forest Fruits Jelly =P
• Finally completed the student exchange application tonight - its due soon. I'm becoming less of a J - inspired by my Boss (though she does things late out of necessity =P.
  
• Oh yeah, and more songwriting. Still not very good, but I hope I'm improving. I have to say I miss my electric (she's on a trip to the East for some warranty repairs - pickup problems). Never mind, the acoustic's still there to caress - i mean play - curse those Freudian slips.
  

I could sing of your love forever

I was at PCLC last weekend, and they had a different take on the song "I could sing of your love forever". I'm sure everyone's heard it before, but the chorus chords are different, and it adds a bit of oomph. Here's to one of my favourite songs

G D B-Em
I could sing of your love forever
C D-Em
I could sing of your love forever
Bm G/B-C
I could sing of your love forever
D
I could sing of your love forever

The procrastination + tennis + pedals post

I think this blog's getting neglected. I only post when i have time - the sign of an uncommitted relationship. Having said that, I probably wouldn't be completely responsible if I'd had blogged too often during my exams - there must be a middle ground somewhere.

Ok enough with that... on to more pressing matters. Somewhere along the course of this year, I've reached the end of my Commerce degree. After handing in my dissertation on the 15th of October, only two exams (on the 5th and 7th November) stood between me and world domination (well ok, a well-deserved summer holiday). With three weeks being the intervening period, I set about to my task with grim abandon... and the world would become my oyster.

Well no, in reality, i relaxed for the first week (lying to myself that I had to prepare for the aforementioned Treasury interview)... and then relaxed for half the following week (convincing myself that i was studying when all i was really doing was MSNing, Facebooking, Guitaring etc etc with lecture notes propped mockingly in front of me. Eventually, somehow I managed to get some study done, and i think both exams went decently (well actually Macroeconomics was a killer, but that's another story).

After the exams, I managed to catch up with Jia Wei, Chelsea and Selina for a good coffee... and caught up. All is well on their fronts =). Later, Richie turned out to be a rather formidable opponent on the tennis court. While it was a tad warm at 2pm today, that will not be an excuse for a rather inept show by yours truly. I got a good belting (6-2, 6-1)... managing to kill myself with unwelcome double faults and unexpected unforced errors. It was sad. All Richie had to do was put the ball in my end of the court (or let me serve), and wait for me to kill myself.

I think the heart-breaker for me was one game in the first set. After a drinks break, with the score poised at a tantalising 2-2, I completely lost my rhythm and lost the next two service games easily. Serving whilst trailing 4-2, i quickly went down 15-40, before managing to pull off one clutch shot after a long rally. More importantly, I had regained some measure of form, and was actually feeling confident of getting the ball in (I'm a confidence player - when i'm feeling hot, i hit well, but otherwise it all goes to pieces). What was one more break point to survive? Richie's return off my serve clipped the tape and dropped on my end. After that, it was all over...
But kudos to Richie - it was a good win, and he made infuriatingly few errors.

Asides from tennis, I've been shopping for guitar pedals lately. I've recently bought the Vox Bulldog Distortion pedal, which has a valve in-built (for non-guitarists, apparently valve amps impart better "sound" than modern solid-state amps). The in-built valve would not mean much to me, unless the sound was good, and thankfully it is (it also wins my younger brother's seal of approval). Across both channels, the distortion is amazing, and you can get a wide variety of sounds from it, from a low-gain distortion, to a more modern-sounding distortion. An excellent pedal with plenty of sweet spots. the only flaw I've identified is that the treble knob affects the unit's volume. Asides from that, its awesome.

At the moment, I'm looking at wah pedals. I'm tossing up between getting the Morley Tremonti Wah pedal, or saving up for the ultimate: the Fulltone Deluxe wah (nearly double the price). Having said that, based on what I've heard on youtube, the former looks like a pretty impressive wah for its price...

And now, back to songwriting (or possibly grabbing a quick bite).

actually i had no idea how to title this post.
It's been a while since i last wrote... I've been rushed a tad off my feet haha so the blogging tends to suffer a little. Basically in the last month or so:

1. I finished the dissertation and handed it in - thank God its done. I never believed that it would take so long to format something, but yeah now i have my own book =P. Thanks to everyone who kept me going and smiling. Appreciate all the help and encouragement. Aside from one night where i ran through on 2 hours sleep, it was pretty good throughout the last week in terms of workload
   
2. Managed to do surprisingly well in 2 midsems i thought i cocked up... so yeah pleasantly surprised.
   
3. Got an interview for the Dept of Treasury's vacation work program - atm am scrambling to get 2 referees for tomorrow's interview. Wish me luck.
4. Been a little busy writing songs for next year's camp - its been a really enjoyable process actually... nothing quite like penning lyrics out on the go. the only problem is i tend to write in spurts, so it has made the rest of my life slightly disjointed
5. Cut the hair... lightheaded
6. Rugby World Cup - enough said
   

That's basically it - doesn't seem like that much does it?

Nic